Mar. 11th, 2015

sitaangel: (Default)
Bullshit. Whoever said time heals all has never been hurt. Time does not heal all.

Time does lessen the pain, though.

It has been years and years and years since I lost Jason and guess what? It still hurts. The day he died is still the hardest day of the year for me. Time has lessened the pain and made it more bearable. The first year after his death was absolute hell and on the first anniversary of his death I hid from the world and let self pity take over. And I cried a lot. To be honest, it was like that for the second and third and fourth years too. By the fifth anniversary of his death…I finally got out of the self pity mode. It still hurt like hell, though. On that one and in subsequent ones, I often times was useless on that day. As the years went by the more the pain lessened and the better I was able to manage each anniversary of his death.

Now? Now I can spend most of the day not dwelling on him and what we had and how much it hurt to lose him. Now it’s only in those moments before sleep that I think about him and mourn the life I should have been able to have with him.

Yes. Time does not heal, darlings; not at all. It will hurt until the day you die, but time will make you stronger and lessen the pain.


sitaangel: (Default)

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