sitaangel: (Default)
I think trust is the most important part of a relationship. Sure, love is important too. Love will get you to the point of wanting to be with someone for the rest of your life and it'll keep you feeling that way. But, if you don't have trust it's not going to matter how much you love the person.

The way I see it, if you get into a relationship with someone you know you can't trust, then you are just plain stupid. Why would you be with someone untrustworthy? If you think you can change them, that's not likely to happen. Don't even waste your time.

If you have issues with trust that are going to keep you from trusting your trustworthy partner, then you shouldn't have gotten into a relationship with them. You should have worked on your trust issues before getting into a relationship with anyone. It's not fair to the other person. You never trusting them is only going to wear on them and eventually make them unhappy in the relationship. That's the only way your trust issues are going to make the relationship turn out. Do yourself and every potential partner a favor and work on those issues before getting into a relationship.

Me personally, I've had many trust issues and still do. However, I've never let them affect my ability to trust the person I am with. After what happened after the last guy I dated my ability to trust new people was shattered.

The things this guy did and said after we broke up were horrible. It left me not knowing how I could trust anyone new. Who is to say the next guy wouldn't do the same thing? Knowing that someone could do that to me again made me not want to trust anyone.

I was not able to trust. And even had I been able to trust, I didn't even want to. I try to live what I preach. After that relationship I knew I had to stay single for a good while. I knew I had to work on my trust issues (and myself) until I could and wanted to trust someone new. It's taken a while. I've been single for over a year now. But, I feel I'm finally in a place where I can trust again. I also want to trust again. Now would be the time to start looking for a relationship.

But, see? That is how it should be done. If you have trust issues don't get into a relationship until you know you can let yourself trust the other person.

It's a common sense theory, really.
sitaangel: (Default)
Actions speak louder than words.

There was once a time when I did not believe that. Words used to always mean more to me than actions did. I think that was because writing is a huge part of my life and thus words are a huge part of my life. I placed more value on words because of that. But, I learned my lesson the hard way.

I dated a guy who knew all the right words to say. He was good. When it came to following through on what he said - well, there was no follow through. He couldn't show that he wanted to be with me. In fact, all his actions just showed me that he didn't really care if he was with me or not. The relationship didn't last long, thankfully. I spent many days during it, though; banging my head against a wall in frustration. It hurt to be dating a guy who acted like he didn't want to be with me.

I realized then that while words are nice and needed, there also has to be actions to back up those words. Now I'm a huge believer in actions speak louder than words. A person can say sorry a thousand times and 'I love you' all they want, but if they're not going to prove that the things they say are true, then they're not worth listening to.

If the person you are in any sort of relationship with treats you like crap, it doesn't matter what they say. They can promise they'll change all they want, but if they don't prove it through their actions, don't believe anything they say. They will just continue to treat you like crap and unless you like being treated like crap, get the hell out. Their words mean crap.

Live by what I live by: If someone wants to be with me they will show me. If they can't or don't want to prove it with their actions, then I don't need to be with them.
sitaangel: (Default)
I have quite a few thoughts on being happy or unhappy in any aspect of your life. I have most of these thoughts written down, but now it's a matter of putting them all together into something presentable.

In the meantime, I ran across the following passage in another blog. This passage really hit a chord in me, especially a few certain sentences in it. I think it is something everyone should think about and take to heart.

Never Making Your Own Happiness a Priority

For the average person happiness is a choice, yet numerous people are unhappy. There are many reasons, but it all boils down to one simple principle: They choose something else over happiness. Because it often takes less effort to be unhappy.

To find true happiness in life you have to follow your heart and intuition. You have to be who you are, and design a lifestyle and career that fulfills you - no matter what that entails or what people say about it. And it is never too late to do so.

So be happy; be yourself. If others don't like it, then let them be. Life isn't about pleasing everybody. Begin today by taking responsibility for your own happiness. You are the only one who can create it. The choice is yours.

What really stood out to me in that passage:

* They choose something else over happiness. Because it often takes less effort to be unhappy.
* To find true happiness in life you have to follow your heart and intuition.
* And it is never too late to do so.
* Life isn't about pleasing everybody.

I couldn't agree more with any of that. It baffles to me to no end how some people choose to be unhappy rather than doing what they need to do to make themselves happy. But, that is for my next post on happiness.
sitaangel: (Default)
I’ve been saying it for a long, long time now that I need to write this particular edition of my Who Am I series. There have been things that have happened in the past that have pissed me off enough to say I was going to write this, but not enough to actually make me write this. I think I’ve been avoiding writing about my views on cheating because I don’t want to come across as some harsh, unforgiving bitch. Unfortunately, I guess that is exactly what I am when it comes to what I think about cheating. Recent events have gone completely beyond pissing me off. So much so, that I’m writing this now. If people want to think I’m a bitch, let’s make sure they think I’m a bitch for all the right reasons and not the wrong reasons. ;)

Where oh where to start? I suppose this is as good as any place to start: Once a cheater, always a cheater. No one will ever be able to convince me otherwise. Every person I have ever known who has cheated on someone has always done it again. Now, I know there very well could be the rare people out there who have cheated and then never done it again, but I’ve never known anyone like that. And so, I’d rather be safe than sorry. I will never ever date a guy that has cheated in the past. He could be the nicest guy in the world, but if he’s cheated in the past it’s likely he’ll do it again. I don’t want to ever put myself into the position of getting cheated on again if I can help it.

Cheating is wrong. It’s as wrong as wrong can get. There is no fucking excuse for it. If you want to sleep with someone outside of your relationship, breakup or divorce or whatever before you start sleeping with other people. It’s pretty simple, folks. If you want to sleep with other people outside of your relationship, then there is probably something wrong with the relationship. You need to either fucking fix it or get the hell out. There is no gray area as far as I am concerned. (If it’s an open relationship then clearly that changes things. I’m just talking solely about monogamous relationships.)

I’ve always said I would never cheat on anyone because it’s just wrong. I can’t stress enough how I so strongly believe in its wrongness. I don’t know, I guess someone raised me right. ;) When I first got cheated on I had a new reason for not cheating on anyone. Yes, it’s still completely and utterly wrong, but the way I felt when I found out – I NEVER want to make anyone feel that way or to be a part of making someone feel that way. I’ve had a lot of heartbreak and pain in my life. The way I felt after I found out the guy I had been dating slept with someone else was the worst thing I have ever felt. I would rather deal with the pain of losing someone I cared deeply about to death than to feel like I did after I had been cheated on. I’m not a mean person. I’m not a horrible person. I don’t like hurting people. So, guess what? I have no desire whatsoever to put anyone through that kind of pain. I wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy.

I hate people who cheat. People who think it is okay to cheat even. I’ve been hit on guys who have been in relationships at the time and I have laid into them for it. If you are an unavailable guy and hit on me I am going to give you a piece of my mind. I will tell you exactly what I think of you and you are likely not going to like me very much afterward. I can point you in the direction of a lot of guys who know that all too well, trust me. A few years back some random guy downtown hit on me even though he had a girlfriend. I gave him a piece of my mind and told him what a low life he was. After that I’d occasionally see him downtown and every time he saw me he’d get as far away from me as he could. That always made me laugh. There was another time when this guy was hitting on me and a friend of his girlfriend saw the whole thing go down – him hitting on me, me bitching him out. This friend told his girlfriend and she actually came up to me and thanked me. I told her there was no need to thank me, but she should probably dump his ass. I wonder if she ever did.. But anyways, I’m getting off track.

If you cheat on someone you should never be forgiven. As far as I am concerned cheating is unforgivable. I honestly don’t understand how some people can forgive someone who has cheated on them. I really don’t. It is one of the worst things you can do to someone. If you cheat on me I’ll hate you for the rest of my life. If you try to cheat on someone with me I’ll hate you even more. I have never been like that and I never will be. I’ll wish all kinds of bad things on you for thinking I’d be like that. :)

Now to the people who think bad things are going on when they aren’t. Say you have two people talking and one is in a relationship while the other is not. Then you have people, who for whatever reason, think something bad is going on because these two people are talking. I hate those kinds of people almost as much as I hate people who cheat. Are their lives so miserable that they have to assume the worst of everyone? Or are they so miserable that they have to cause problems with others to make themselves feel better about their own lives? That’s no way to be, people. It’s those kinds of people who give good people a bad name. It makes it real difficult for the good ones to be happy because now they have to deal with people who want to cause drama in your life and for no good reason whatsoever. To those people: grow the hell up.

And to all the cheaters out there: Go to hell. ;)
sitaangel: (Default)

1. Read 50 books.
2. Buy 30 books.
3. Write in my LJ at least 3-4 times a week.
4. Crochet Aiden a blanket and Cagen a blanket.


1. Crochet dad a blanket.
2. Crochet another blanket for me.
3. Write in my paper journal at least 4 times a week.
4. Exercise regularly
5. Continue to not smoke.
6. Don't gain any weight!

I lowered the books read goal for this year because I don't want to deal with the pressure of trying to reach a high number of books read. I know I can read 70 books in a year. I did that this year. Although, with those last four books I was under a lot of pressure to read them fast in order to make that goal. I didn't like that. I do go through periods where I don't read much and I just want my goal for books read to be at a reasonable number so that I don't end up finding myself having to read 5 books in 12 days or something.

I need to keep my LJ updated better this year. I so sucked at that last year. I still have room on my bookshelves for a few more books, so I need to make sure I buy books this year to fill the shelves up. Haha. I've already got the blankets for the kids started and they won't let me not finish the blankets, so I know that is a resolution I can keep.

I think I've said this every year for the past few years, but I really am going to try to crochet dad a blanket for xmas this year. Haha. I'll crochet myself another blanket if I get around to it. I need to exercise on a regular basis. My continuing not smoking is entirely dependent upon me not gaining lots of weight. So we should really hope I don't start to gain lots of weight like I did the last time quit.

Happy New Years everyone! :) May 2012 be better than 2011 and hopefully the world doesn't end. Hehe.
sitaangel: (Default)
Wanted: 5ml bottles of..


Snow White '07
Archangel Winter
Love's Philosophy
House of Mirrors
I Fell in Love With a Floating Brain


Antique Lace

Wanted: 5ml bottles or partials or decants of..


Pink Moon '07
Velvet Unicorn
Cheshire Moon
Dolce Stil Nuovo
Meditation in Autumn
Old Moon
Fearful Pleasure

Wanted: imps or decants of..

GC Imps

GC Imps )
sitaangel: (Default)
U.S. horse slaughter plants in the very early stages of planning, proponent says

... Words fail me. There is so much I want to say about this, but at the same time I don't know what to say...

It's bad enough that the government has paved the way for the three slaughter plants that closed in 2007 to reopen, but now people will be trying to open completely new slaughter plants? What the hell.

The Wyoming state representative said her pro-slaughter group “United Horsemen,” is working closely with entities to open what she says will be humane slaughter plants. Humane slaughter plants? Yeah right.

Wallis also said she is working with some tribes on eventually opening plants to help control multiplying wild horse herds. #%)&*#W$ That just makes me what to hit something. Pisses me off that the slaughter of horses is going to start happening again in this country. Pisses me off that there is someone out there who wants to make plans to start slaughtering the wild horses.

Everyone in the horse world is so excited we may have an opportunity to turn the whole equine market around. Are you fucking kidding me? This bitch is making it sound like "everyone in the horse world" thinks this is the best thing to happen since [insert your own thought].

... I know I will have more to say on this, but I need to get my thoughts sorted out first.
sitaangel: (Default)
Originally posted by [ profile] write_light at BAD Internet Laws Heading Your Way

From the flist: 

Spread the word, even you're not a US citizen, it is important for everyone!! It easy to do and it can change everything. More info by clicking on the banner.

Website Blocking

The government can order service providers to block websites for infringing links posted by any users.

Risk of Jail for Ordinary Users

It becomes a felony with a potential 5 year sentence to stream a copyrighted work that would cost more than $2,500 to license, even if you are a totally noncommercial user, e.g. singing a pop song on Facebook.

Chaos for the Internet

Thousands of sites that are legal under the DMCA would face new legal threats. People trying to keep the internet more secure wouldn't be able to rely on the integrity of the DNS system.

Read this analysis from

Get on the phone and call your representative. Express your disapproval. Tell him or her exactly how you feel, and that you don't support this. Tell your friends to call their representatives, their Congressperson, and complain. Mention that you are a registered voter that takes your civic responsibility seriously and that you will use that vote to express your feelings about this.

“We support the bill’s stated goals — providing additional enforcement tools to combat foreign ‘rogue’ websites that are dedicated to copyright infringement or counterfeiting,” the Internet companies wrote in Tuesday’s letter. “Unfortunately, the bills as drafted would expose law-abiding U.S. Internet and technology companies to new uncertain liabilities, private rights of action and technology mandates that would require monitoring of websites.”  The chamber-led coalition in support of the bill includes Walmart, Eli Lilly & Co. and Netflix.

Google and other opponents of the legislation argue that restricting the Internet in the U.S. sets a bad international precedent and that the language defines infringing too broadly.

sitaangel: (Default)
For the longest time I was never extremely picky about what I looked for in a guy. When that didn’t work out so well for me I decided to try and be extremely picky. Well, that ended up not working out so well for me either. Haha. As the years go by I’ve slowly started to realize more and more what I’m looking for. I do believe I’m not to the point where I know with 100% certainty what I want, but for now the following is what I want or need in a relationship or in a guy.

The most important thing I need in a relationship is complete honesty. I have to be able to trust the guy I am with. If he lies to me (no matter how small the lie is) I’m going to have a problem with him. This clearly comes from my trust issues. They are huge, let me tell you. I’ve been lied to so many times in the past that I’m not sure I can even trust anyone anymore. I’ve always gone into new relationships telling myself that I need to ignore my trust issues. I need to not expect the guy to lie to me. I’m often surprised with myself, but I have always managed to push my trust issues to the back of my mind and to not let them interfere with the relationship. Of course, most of those relationships left me with bigger trust issues, but I’d still keep on ignoring them. However, after my last relationship I’m not sure it’s possible to do that anymore. I think this guy was finally the guy who completely shattered my trust and ruined my ability to ignore my trust issues anymore. So, if I am to ever get into another relationship that guy is going to have to prove to me that he won’t lie to me before I even consider dating him.

The needy need not apply. I do not do well at all with needy guys. If a guy wants someone to pay attention to him and to coddle him 24/7, I am definitely not the woman he wants. Even if I wanted to I couldn’t give someone my full attention 24/7 – I have kids for crap sakes! Notice I said even if I wanted to. I don’t want to. I want to be able to focus on other things too when I’m in a relationship. Needy guys make me feel trapped. When I feel trapped I start to pull away. Once I start to pull away the relationship is doomed. Don’t be needy please. :)

Psychos need not apply. Seriously, I have the worst luck when it comes to guys going completely nuts on me when the relationship ends and in a couple of cases, while we were dating. I don’t try to date these kinds of guys, but nevertheless I keep ending up with them. My ability to read psychos before I date them is clearly lacking.

I am who I am. I don’t ever pretend to be someone I am not. If a guy is going to pretend to be someone he isn’t OR if he is going to pretend he is okay with who I am when he really isn’t, I don’t want him. I will always tell a guy up front what kind of person I am so that he can decide if how I am is a right fit for him. Lately I’ve had a problem with guys saying that they are okay with how I am and then it turning out they weren’t really. That messes with my head. It makes me wonder if I’ll ever be good enough for someone. Plus I don’t like guys trying to change me, especially when they try to do so under the guise of compromising. If you don’t like who I am don’t date me. I am who I am and I’m not going to change for a guy.

I’ve recently come to a realization. I’ve only ever dated two guys who I thought were it for me. Obviously neither of the relationships worked out and most of you all know the reasons. I realized that in both relationships I never once had a single doubt about the relationship or the guy. I may be coming late to the party on this one, but I figure if I can find that again that is the guy I’m supposed to be with for a very long time.

I am looking for a guy that can make me laugh. I want a guy that I can be completely comfortable around. I want someone who wants to spend time with me, but doesn’t want to spend every single minute of his free time with me. I want someone who doesn’t mind spending time with me when my kids are around. I want someone who is kind and loving. Someone who can joke around, but be serious too. I want someone who cares about what I have to say when I do actually want to talk. ;) I want someone who doesn’t always need to be talking to me; someone who is okay with sitting in silence occasionally. I want someone who wants to be with me because of who I am. I want someone who is faithful. I want someone who is good in bed, ha. Most importantly I want someone who is going to be honest with me.

Deal breakers:

1. Cheating. If a guy cheats on me we are done. I will not ever forgive that.
2. Lying. If I can’t trust a guy it definitely won’t work.
3. Abuse of any kind to me or my kids. No explanation needed.
4. A guy who threatens to breakup with you every time he doesn’t like something you say or you do. I went through that with Jeff and it drove me nuts. I’m not ever going to deal with that again.
sitaangel: (Default)
Over two years ago I wrote the first Love Edition of my Who Am I series. In the two years and some odd months I’ve tried and failed to get into a relationship with a guy, gotten my heart broken, and dated a couple complete asses. What have I learned from those relationships?

1. No matter how much you want to be with someone, it doesn’t mean that you will be. Accept that before you end up getting hurt.

2. Just because someone is the one for you doesn’t mean you are the one of them.

3. Don’t ever date anyone with tons of issues that will affect the relationship. You’ll just end up banging your head against the wall more than you ever thought you would.

4. Everyone and their brother can tell you a guy is a great, nice guy, but that doesn’t mean crap. Apparently even a so-called “nice guy” can be a complete psycho.

Now where do these past relationships leave me? In some ways they leave me wondering why the hell I’m even trying anymore. But, it only makes me wonder that briefly. I’ll think that and then right after I remind myself that I keep trying because I’m not ready to accept that I’ll end up alone for the rest of my life. I really don’t want that so I keep trying.

So, yes, I still believe in a happy ever after that has love in it. I still believe that it will be very, very hard, but well worth it in the end. Yet, my view on it has also changed a bit. When I wrote the last edition I realized that maybe the reason my relationships weren’t working out was because I refused to let these guys get close to me. I’d hold them at a distance. Sure, I’d let myself fall in love with some of them, but never as in love as I could be. I did this so that if (when) the relationship didn’t work out I wouldn’t be horribly hurt. I decided that what I needed to do was let someone get close to me. I tried that with the guy I couldn’t get into a relationship with. I let him close to me while he was too afraid to let me get close to him. As a result I ended up getting hurt even though I never even dated him. Even so, I decided to let another guy get close to me. That didn’t work out so well either and I ended up getting my heart torn out. After that, I said screw it. I can’t deal with being hurt like this over and over. So the last two relationships I didn’t let the guys get close to me and I didn’t get hurt. Now I’m single again and I’m back to do I try to let someone close to me or not again.

I know in order to get my happy ever after I do have to eventually let someone close to me. But, for now I’ve got a wall that’s a mile high up around me. I shall still look for love, but I have to say I’m more jaded about it.

Love is a perky elf dancing a merry little jig and then suddenly he turns on you with a miniature machine gun. ~ Matt Groening

That above, is where the past two years has left me.
sitaangel: (Default)
I just want to see if I did this right. Ha.
sitaangel: (Default)
Books by Lucy Snyder:
* Spellbent
* Shotgun Sorceress
* Switchblade Goddess (When it comes out.)

Books by Margaret Ronald
* Spiral Hunt
* Wild Hunt
* Soul Hunt

Books by Lilith Saintcrow:
* Working for the Devil
* Dead Man Rising
* The Devil's Right Hand
* Saint City Sinners
* To Hell and Back
* Night Shift
* Hunter's Prayer
* Redemption Alley
* Flesh Circus
* Heaven's Spite

Books by Tanya Huff:
* Summon the Keeper
* The Second Summoning
* Long Hot Summoning

Books by Kelley Armstrong:
* Bitten
* Stolen
* Dime Store Magic
* Industrial Magic
* Haunted
* Broken
* No Humans Involved
* Personal Demon
* Living with the Dead
* Frostbitten
* Waking the Witch
* Spell Bound
* The Summoning
* The Awakening
* The Reckoning
* The Gathering
sitaangel: (Default)
So, this year I have resolutions and goals. I'm pretty sure my resolution list is complete, but I'm sure I'll had more to my goals list when I have more time to think about it. But, this is what I have so far:

* Read 70 books.
* Get ALL my poems in their final resting place by the end of the year.
* Do better at writing about stuff when it happens in my LJ.
* Manage my time better.
* Stop procrastinating so much on anything.
* Buy at least 30 books this year.

* Crochet Dad a blanket for xmas.
* Crochet Keith a blanket for xmas.
* Crochet a shawl and another blanket for myself by the end of the year.
sitaangel: (Default)
All the books I am about to list are all books I have yet to read and want to. Yeah, I know I'm coming into the game late with some of these books, but it is as they say: better late then never!

Books by Charles de Lint:
* Dreams Underfoot
* The Dreaming Place
* A Whisper to a Scream
* I'll Be Watching You
* Memory and Dream
* The Ivory and the Horn
* Trader
* Someplace to Be Flying
* Moonlight and Vines
* Forests of the Heart
* The Onion Girl
* Seven Wild Sisters
* Tapping the Dream Tree
* Spirits in the Wires
* Medicine Road
* The Blue Girl
* Widdershins
* Waifs and Strays

Books By John Grisham:
* Ford County: Stories
* The Confession

Books By Brad Meltzer:
* The First Counsel
* The Inner Circle
* The Millionaires
* The Zero Game
* Dead Even
* The Tenth Justice

Books By Bentley Little
* The Disappearance
* His Father's Son
* The Academy

Books By L.J. Smith:
* The Awakening
* The Struggle
* The Fury
* Dark Reunion
* The Return: Nightfall
* The Return: Shadow Souls
* The Return: Midnight
* Stefan's Diaries: Origins
* Stefan's Diaries: Bloodlust

Laurell K. Hamilton's Anita Blake Series
* Guilty Pleasures
* The Laughing Corpse
* Circus of the Damned
* The Lunatic Cafe
* Bloody Bones
* The Killing Dance
* Burnt Offerings
* Blue Moon
* Obsidian Butterfly
* Narcissus in Chains
* Cerulean Sins
* Incubus Dreams
* Micah
* Danse Macabre
* The Harlequin
* Blood Noir
* Skin Trade
* Flirt
* Bullet

Anne Bishop's Black Jewels Series
* Daughter of the Blood
* Heir to the Shadows
* Queen of the Darkness
* The Invisible Ring
* Dreams Made Flesh
* Tangled Webs
* The Shadow Queen

Books By Seanan McGuire(& Mira Grant):
* Rosemary and Rue
* A Local Habitation
* An Artificial Night
* Feed (Mira Grant)

Books By Catherynn M. Valente:
* Palimpsest
* The Habitation of the Blessed

Books by Random Authors:
* The Hundred Thousand Kingdoms By: N.K. Jemisin
* Elfland By: Freda Warrington
* Prospero Lost By: L. Jagi Lamplighter
* Four and Twenty Blackbirds By: Cherie Priest
* War for the Oaks By: Emma Bull
* The Dark Mirror By: Juliet Marillier
* All the Windwracked Stars By: Elizabeth Bear
* Indigo Springs By: A.M. Dellamonica
* Firebird By: Mercedes Lackey
* Tooth and Claw By: Jo Walton
* The Gaslight Dogs By: Karin Lowachee

I am positive there are many, many other books out there that I want to read. I just haven't bothered to put them down on my list yet. Haha.
sitaangel: (Default)
Last week I happened upon one of Steve Haskin's blog posts. In this post he listed 50 of the best fillies in the past 50 years. The list was in no particular order. From that post readers of his blog got to vote on who would be in a top 50 list and when that was said and done, he posted that list. It was the fans' list that made me think about who I would put on my list of top fillies in the past 50 years. I have come up with my top ten list. Doing a top 50 list would have hurt my head and would have taken entirely way too long. So, who I think the top ten fillies in the past 50 years are:

1. Lady's Secret

Pros - Horse of the Year, won 25 of 45 starts, including 22 stakes, defeated colts in the Whitney, placed in 3 grade I stakes vs. males, won Breeders' Cup Distaff, won stakes from 6 furlongs to 1 ¼ miles, ran in 15 stakes as a 4-year-old, 13 of them grade I and 4 vs. males, and was never out of the money, won Ruffian under 129 lbs

Cons - Won only two allowance races in five starts at 5

2. Ruffian

Pros - Won all 10 starts in which she finished, broke down in match race, her average margin of victory was 8 ½ lengths, ran in 9 stakes at 7 different distances from 5 furlongs to 1 ½ miles and set or equaled a stakes record in all of them, swept Filly Triple Crown

Cons - Never defeated males

3. Personal Ensign

Pros - Retired undefeated in 13 starts, defeated Kentucky Derby winner Winning Colors in Breeders' Cup Distaff and Maskette, defeated eventual sprint champion Gulch in the Whitney, also won grade I Beldame, Shuvee, and Hempstead

Cons - Only raced 13 times

4. Bayakoa

Pros - Won 21 of 39 starts, won Breeders' Cup Distaff twice, won 16 stakes, including 12 grade I's, won Santa Margarita twice, Spinster, Ruffian, Vanity, Apple Blossom, group I winner in Argentina vs, males

Cons - 0-for-2 vs. males in U.S., lost last three career starts

5. Genunie Risk

Pros - Won Kentucky Derby, first filly since Regret, and finished 2nd in the Preakness and Belmont Stakes, won Ruffian, Demoiselle, finished third in the Wood Memorial

Cons - Concluded her career in three allowance races, beaten a nose by Bold ‘n Determined in Maskette Stakes

6. Inside Information

Pros - Won 14 of 17 starts, including 13 ½-length win in Breeders' Cup Distaff, 11-length win in Ruffian, and 11-length win in Acorn, also won grade I Spinster, Shuvee, and Ashland

Cons - Never raced against males

7. Shuvee

Pros - Swept Filly Triple Crown and won Alabama at 3, won back-to-back runnings of the 2-mile Jockey Club Gold Cup, won a total of 15 stakes, won major stakes at 2, 3, 4, and 5, including Beldame, Diana twice, Ladies Handicap, Frizette, and Top Flight

Cons - Beaten in 3 of her 4 meetings with Gallant Bloom, including Gazelle for 3-year-old filly honors

8. Ta Wee

Pros - Won 15 of 21 starts, defeated colts in the Vosburgh and Fall Highweight on two occasions, once carrying 140 lbs, won Interborough Handicap under 142 lbs, won Miss Woodford in 1:08 3/5, won 7f Vosburgh in 1:21 3/5

Cons - Strictly a sprinter

9. Azeri

Pros - Horse of the Year, won 11 grade I stakes, including Breeders' Cup Distaff, Apple Blossom 3 times, Vanity and Milady twice, Spinster, Santa Margarita, won 17 of 24 starts

Cons - Out of the money in only two starts vs. males

10. Gallant Bloom

Pros - Won 12 races in a row at 2, 3, and 4, easily defeated two future Hall of Famers in Shuvee and Gamely, champion at 2 and 3, won stakes from 6 furlongs to 1 1/8 miles, won Santa Margarita under 129 lbs, won 16 of 22 career starts, beat Shuvee 3 out of 4 times

Cons - Defeated twice by males late in career (injured in latter), suffered 3 bad losses at 2 after inexplicably losing her form


Now, before I post the top ten on the fans' list, I'll remind everyone that I love Zenyatta and I think Rachel Alexandra is a good horse. With that said, I don't believe Zenyatta should be ranked first because a lot of the other horses on the list probably could have beat her (sad to say). And unfortunately, I don't think either Zenyatta or Rachel Alexandra is good enough to be on a top 10 list. Especially when comparing them to all these great fillies of the past. I hate saying that.

The top ten horses on the list that people voted horses on:

1. Zenyatta
2. Ruffian
3. Personal Ensign
4. Rachel Alexandra
5. Lady's Secret
6. Genuine Risk
7. Azeri
8. Go For Wand
9. Shuvee
10. Rags to Riches

For the hell of it, what Steve Haskin's top ten list would be if he was pressed to make one:

I'm actually not big on top 10 lists myself and this was geared more toward the fan. Also, with Zenyatta and Rachel still racing, the public perception of them could change by the end of the year. If Zenyatta were to win the Classic again or another big race on dirt, I would have to rank her No. 1.

But as of right now, I still would rank Ruffian No. 1 and perhaps Lady's Secret #2, followed by Zenyatta, Personal Ensign, Rachel Alexandra (she also would move way up with another big win vs. males), Gallant Bloom, Shuvee, Ta Wee, Dark Mirage, and Gamely.
sitaangel: (Default)
So, here I was writing out my who am I post about the type of guy I find myself drawn to. In writing about that I had to write a bit about being shy and I finally figured the whole shy part should probably be in its own little post.

Last night I went out with mum and Doris. At one point Doris had asked me if my mum had ever told me the story she told mum about Nathan (Doris’ grandson). In particular what Nathan had said about me. At first I had no idea what she was talking about, but as soon as she started telling me I realized mum had in fact already told me this (a long time ago). Way back when I was little I had spent a lot of time playing with Nathan. Mum was still working at the newspaper in West Salem and thus she was still working with Doris. Both Nathan and I were close in age, so I guess it was natural they would set up play dates (for a lack of a better word) for us. Hmm, I think it was probably a couple years ago that Nathan had told Doris that if I had only talked more, he could have very well seen himself end up with me. Ha! I just did not talk all that much to him. That is how I was when I was little, though.

When I was little I seriously would not talk to anyone who wasn’t in my immediate family. I was that shy. The teachers could never get me to talk in school and often mentioned it to my mum during conferences. She, of course, would just laugh because at home you couldn’t shut me up. I still remember the night I was quiet for five minutes at dinner and my dad made a huge deal out of it. I didn’t talk all day in school, so I had to get all my talking done at home and before bed. And, well, even then I’d talk in my sleep. Haha.

If you know me now, you know that I’m not nearly that shy anymore, thank goddess. Over the years I slowly got better about talking to other people. First it was family friends and well, teachers in school. For the longest time, however; I had the hardest time talking to strangers. I don’t think it really was until I started working at Burger King (junior in high school) that I started getting more comfortable talking to strangers. That came about because of the people I worked with and ended up hanging out with a lot. They were all outgoing and they weren’t going to let me get away with being shy.

As the years have gone on from there I’ve gotten better and better about not being shy. I honestly don’t think I’m that shy anymore. Yes, I’m still a little uncomfortable around people I don’t know and I might not talk a lot to people I don’t know. It’s not that way with all strangers though. It really depends on the person. I find I have no problems talking to some people, while others it might take me a while to warm up to them. Well, unless I’ve had a couple of beers in me. Then I’ll talk to anyone and not have a single problem with it. Haha. I’m quiet compared to someone who is more outgoing, but a lot of people can’t really tell it’s because I might be shy.

I’ve never really met anyone who had a problem with me being on the quiet side. That is until Willie. I guess in the end he had a problem with it. I guess he felt like he had to apologize for me not talking a lot while I was down there visiting him over Christmas. That kind of makes me paranoid now. I am not that quiet of a person unless you are a complete stranger (and I haven’t been drinking or I haven’t taken an instant liking to you). Now I just can’t help but think maybe I am entirely way too quiet. And as stupid as it is, that just makes me not want to talk to anyone I don’t know. If I don’t talk to them at all then they aren’t going to talk to me obviously. Then I won’t have to explain to them that I am a somewhat quiet person and it takes me a while to warm up to certain people. But, once I get to know someone I have no problems talking to them a lot. And I won’t have to worry about them deciding down the road that I am too quiet for them. *sighs*

Yes, I’m still a bit shy. Not so much anymore that people really notice it. I just come off as a quiet person. It’s not like I don’t talk to people I don’t know at all. If they start a conversation with me, I’ll talk back to them. I just generally don’t start a conversation with someone I don’t know unless I’m comfortable with them. That is all my shyness is now.
sitaangel: (Default)
First, let's take a look back at last year's resolutions. They were:

1. Read 50 books.
2. Make dad a blanket for Christmas
3. Write 50 new poems this year and have them all put in their final resting place by the end of the year.
4. Not procrastinate so much on school work.
5. Do a better job of writing things down in this journal when they happen(There was so much last year that I had meant to write about, but never did.) and comment more.

Out of those five, I really only didn't fail at two of them. I did read 50 books and I did write 50 new poems and have been put in their final resting place. I decided to not make dad a blanket for xmas, so technically I failed at that one. I think I procrastinated more last year than the year before. Big fail. I was horrible at writing things down in this journal when they happened and I'm still bad at commenting. Woe.

So. Now for this year's resolutions:

1. Read at least 50 books.
2. Try not to procrastinate so much. (I'm fully expecting to fail at this one again. Hah)
3. Exercised more and eat better.
4. Make blankets for Christmas.
5. Get out of the house more and spend more time with friends.

My prediction is I'll achieve four of those.


Nov. 20th, 2009 08:41 pm
sitaangel: (Default)
Note: Please take time to read this slowly.
If you pay attention to the first two judges,
the reaction of the third judge is even better.

For those of you who have lived in New Mexico , you know how true this is. They actually have a Chili Cook-off about the time Halloween comes around. It takes up a major portion of a parking lot at the Santa Fe Plaza . Judge #3 was an inexperienced Chile taster named Frank, who was visiting from Springfield, IL .
Frank: Recently, I was honored to be selected as a judge at a chili cook-off. The original person called in sick at the last moment and I happened to be standing there at the judge's table, asking for directions to the Coors Light truck, when the call came in. I was assured by the other two judges (Native New Mexicans) that the chili wouldn't be all that spicy; and, besides, they told me I could have free beer during the tasting, so I accepted and became Judge #3.
Here are the scorecard notes from the event:

Judge # 1 -- A little too heavy on the tomato. Amusing kick.
Judge # 2 -- Nice, smooth tomato flavor. Very mild.
Judge # 3 (Frank) -- Holy crap, what the hell is this stuff? You could remove dried paint from your driveway. Took me two beers to put the flames out. I hope that's the worst one. These New Mexicans are crazy.

Judge # 1 -- Smoky, with a hint of pork. Slight jalapeno tang.
Judge # 2 -- Exciting BBQ flavor, needs more peppers to be taken seriously.
Judge # 3 -- Keep this out of the reach of children. I'm not sure what I'm supposed to taste besides pain. I had to wave off two people who wanted to give me theHeimlich maneuver. They had to rush in more beer when they saw the look on my face.

Judge # 1 -- Excellent firehouse chili. Great kick.
Judge # 2 -- A bit salty, good use of peppers.
Judge # 3 -- Call the EPA. I've located a uranium spill. My nose feels like I have been snorting Drano. Everyone knows the routine by now. Get me more beer before I ignite. Barmaid pounded me on the back, now my backbone is in the front part of my chest. I'm getting sh*t-faced from all of the beer.

Judge # 1 -- Black bean chili with almost no spice. Disappointing.
Judge # 2 -- Hint of lime in the black beans. Good side dish for fish or other mild foods, not much of a chili.
Judge # 3 -- I felt something scraping across my tongue, but was unable to taste it. Is it possible to burn out taste buds? Sally, the beer maid, was standing behind me with fresh refills. This 300 lb. Woman is starting to look HOT ... Just like this nuclear waste I'm eating! Is chili an aphrodisiac?

Judge # 1 -- Meaty, strong chili. Jalapeno peppers freshly ground, adding considerable kick. Very impressive.
Judge # 2 -- Chili using shredded beef, could use more tomato. Must admit the jalapeno peppers make a strong statement.
Judge # 3 -- My ears are ringing, sweat is pouring off my forehead and I can no longer focus my eyes. I farted, and four people behind me needed paramedics. The contestant seemed offended when I told her that her chili had given me brain damage. Sally saved my tongue from bleeding by pouring beer directly on it from the pitcher. I wonder if I'm burning my lips off. It really ticks me off that the other judges asked me to stop screaming. Screw them.

Judge # 1 -- Thin yet bold vegetarian variety chili. Good balance of spices and peppers.
Judge # 2 -- The best yet. Aggressive use of peppers, onions, garlic. Superb.
Judge # 3 -- My intestines are now a straight pipe filled with gaseous, sulfuric flames. I crapped on myself when I farted, and I'm worried it will eat through the chair. No one seems inclined to stand behind me except that Sally. Can't feel my lips anymore. I need to wipe my butt with a snow cone.

Judge # 1 -- A mediocre chili with too much reliance on canned peppers.
Judge # 2 -- Ho hum, tastes as if the chef literally threw in a can of chili peppers at the last moment. **I should take note that I am worried about Judge #3. He appears to be in a bit of distress as he is cursing uncontrollably.
Judge # 3 -- You could put a grenade in my mouth, pull the pin, and I wouldn't feel a thing. I've lost sight in one eye, and the world sounds like it is made of rushing water. My shirt is covered with chili, which slid unnoticed out of my mouth. My pants are full of lava to match my shirt. At least during the autopsy, they'll know what killed me. I've decided to stop breathing. It's too painful. Screw it; I'm not getting any oxygen anyway. If I need air, I'll just suck it in through the 4-inch hole in my stomach.

Judge # 1 -- The perfect ending, this is a nice blend chili. Not too bold but spicy enough to declare its existence.
Judge # 2 -- This final entry is a good, balanced chili. Neither mild nor hot. Sorry to see that most of it was lost when Judge #3 farted, passed out, fell over and pulled the chili pot down on top of himself. Not sure if he's going to make it. Poor fella, wonder how he'd have reacted to really hot chili?
Judge # 3 -- No report.
sitaangel: (Default)
I found these to be very interesting. I haven't watched the last five minutes of the second video though. I fell asleep and by the time I woke up again it was late and I figured I'd best go to bed instead of watching it all over.

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